[Keith]

I bet the Professionals have a whole lifetime of them.

Last time I had to call a Professional he told us that he had to go service a house with a super obese lady. He said her turds kept clogging up the toilet. He would go there, fish them out and break them up to flush. Later the same day her husband called angry that the toilet was still clogged. He had to go out there and show him via camera the giant turd. Told him his wife would have to break them up with a stick or something. He said he was really embarrassed to tell him that.

[Local16 Omaha]

Had an old school service guy grab a turd out of a toilet, take a big whiff and say: "Smells like peanut butter toast!"

I almost puked all over myself!

[wilson]

Originally Posted by Local16 Omaha

Had an old school service guy grab a turd out of a toilet, take a big whiff and say: "Smells like peanut butter toast!"

I almost puked all over myself!

That's amazingly disgusting. I would ask if he was wearing gloves, but I'm sure he wasn't. At that point I guess it doesn't really matter.

[Local16 Omaha]

LOL. Some of the old pollack plumbers here are pretty crude

[Austin]

Any new guys have anything funny?

[Chris]

I'm not new.

[Austin]

Originally Posted by Chris

I'm not new.

But you still have that new car smell... odd.

[Chris]

Wierd isn't it.

[Austin]

Originally Posted by Chris

Wierd isn't it.

Not as weird as some things.

[Caduceus]

Okay. A few years ago I roughed-in a custom home in a well-to-do type neighborhood. That went well and so did the trim, but the lady of the house always seemed to be complaining about little details and was quickly stifled by hear husband. Just giving an idea of the personalities involved.
About 2 weeks after the house closing, the builder calls my boss and tells him that the master bathroom over the kitchen flooded and destroyed drywall, cabinets, etc. and the husband is going to sue everybody! After having my a$$ handed to me, the boss sends me out to the house.
The huffing and red faced wife meets me at the door and starts letting me have it. Every rude comment in the book. I head upstairs with her to investigate. She said water just started pouring out of the ceiling, flooding everything and suddenly stopped. Then she went downstairs to call her hubby and loudly comment again on the stupid plumbers.
Looking at the water all over the master bath and under the cabinets, something didn't seem right. Random puddles and splashes. No leaks now when I water test. Water on the walls and mirrors?
Enter the 7 year old daughter....
"Hi, are you the plumber?"
Yes
"Are you here because Billy and Tommy had a water balloon fight in the bathroom while mommy was taking a nap? It was really bad. She put all of the broken balloons in my garbage can. Look how many. Mommy told daddy that the stupid plumbers did it and my daddy is gonna sue everybody."
Hmmm. I called the builder and my boss. They stopped over and I called in Suzie and had her repeat what she told me in front of her unexpecting mother and the bosses as well as presented the garbage pail filled with broken balloons. Apparently mom gathered all of the evidence and didn't want to upset her husband so she blamed us. It appeared to be 2 bags of water balloons and maybe some battle with the hand sprayers from the shower and whirlpool tub.
She quickly asked us to leave and we never heard from them again.
The End.